Coaching IS: About You, NOT About Your Problems
Coaching is one of the most misunderstood tools in business and leadership. It’s often confused with consulting, mentoring, or even therapy or performance management. As a result, its real value and potential to transform people and conversations is overlooked.
As coaching becomes more common in organizational settings, leadership development, and professional and personal growth, it’s worth slowing down to clarify what coaching actually IS and just as importantly, what it IS NOT. This series is meant to bring nuance, realism, and clarity to the conversation, grounded in practical experience rather than hype. Because when coaching is understood properly, it can be a powerful support for how people think, lead, and work.
“Here’s where coaching shifts the perspective. Instead of obsessing over what’s broken, coaching turns the spotlight on you as the decision-maker, the leader, the entrepreneur, the professional with untapped potential.”
When most people first think of coaching, they imagine sitting down with a coach and listing all the things that aren’t working: the long hours, the difficult clients, the stress of managing a team, the cash flow, the lack of metrics, or the challenge of balancing personal life with professional demands. But here’s the truth:
Coaching is not about your work problems. Coaching is about you.
This distinction matters. Coaching isn’t about fixing what’s broken; it’s about unlocking potential, building confidence, and aligning your actions with your values and goals.
Think of it like this: if your business is a garden, coaching isn’t about pulling weeds. It’s about creating the conditions for the soil, sun, and water to harvest the plants you want and need:
You decide what you want.
You create the conditions to make it happen.
You action the right things.
You harvest the outcomes.
Why We’re Conditioned to Focus on Problems
We are conditioned to focus on the problems, frustrations, and barriers that impede the life we want. The traffic that slows us down, the unexpected bill we got, the landlord who won’t fix the leak, the person who quit on a Friday before a long weekend. These daily experiences are everywhere. Some we can control, and some we can’t, but our mindset about them (the YOU) is the fix, not the many things we can’t avoid (the problems).
It’s natural to bring this mindset into coaching: “Here are all my problems, can you help me fix them?”
But here’s where coaching shifts the perspective. Instead of obsessing over what’s broken, coaching turns the spotlight on you as the decision-maker, the leader, the entrepreneur, the professional with untapped potential.
In that sense, problems are not the starting point.
Of course, problems exist. Every entrepreneur, leader, or business owner faces them:
A clinic owner struggling with staff turnover.
A law firm partner managing client demands that never end.
A small business owner overwhelmed by cash flow concerns.
An industry or competitor threat.
A slowing of leads or referrals.
A negative review or post online.
Difficulties recruiting.
These issues are real, but in coaching, they’re not the story. Instead, they serve as entry points for bigger conversations:
What do these problems reveal about your business?
What shifts can you make?
How can you solve them in alignment with your values?
What options do you have?
Where is the opportunity?
What leadership skills can you leverage?
Problems act like signposts pointing to deeper opportunities for growth.
Coaching Shifts the Focus
Here’s how coaching reframes the conversation:
Instead of asking: “How do I stop my business from feeling chaotic?”
A coach might ask: “What would calm look like for you?”Instead of: “Why do I always feel stuck with tough clients?”
The focus becomes: “What kind of client best suits you?”Instead of: “How can I get on top of cash flow?”
The question is: “What will cash flow do for you?”
It’s a forward-looking, person-centered approach. It starts and ends with you.
Coaching is About You
So what does it mean to say coaching is about you?
Your goals. Coaching helps you identify and clarify what success looks like on your terms.
Your values. It ensures your decisions and actions align with what matters most to you.
Your strengths. Coaching amplifies what you already do well, instead of dwelling on what you don’t.
Your accountability. You set the course, and your coach helps you stay on track.
This people-centered approach is what makes coaching so effective. Rather than patching over problems, coaching equips you to grow into the person and leader you want to become.
Practical Outcomes of a You-Focused Approach
When coaching centers on you instead of your problems, here’s what happens:
You gain greater clarity. You stop spinning in circles about what’s wrong and start focusing on what’s next.
You have improved resilience. Challenges don’t derail you because you’re grounded in who you are and what you want.
Your growth becomes sustainable. Instead of patchwork fixes, you build long-term systems aligned with your values.
You are more confident in your decisions. You lead from a place of strength, you have a partner in mental decision-making ping-pong, and you have less fear.
Examples in Action
Entrepreneur: Rather than obsessing about weak sales, coaching focuses on helping the owner clarify their ideal client, design better offerings, and build confidence in marketing conversations.
Business owner: Instead of focusing solely on high staff turnover, coaching explores helping the owner to understand their leadership and communication styles, to explore workplace culture, and to create a thriving environment.
Corporate leader: Rather than dwelling on office politics and system barriers, coaching focuses on the leader’s vision, strengths, and influence, giving them tools to navigate challenges with clarity.
Problems Don’t Disappear… But They Shrink
A powerful outcome of focusing on you is that problems stop taking center stage. They don’t vanish, but they no longer define your experience and your headspace. Here are some common misconceptions:
“If I ignore the problem, it will just get worse.” Coaching doesn’t ignore problems. It repositions them as secondary to your leadership and growth.
“Coaching will solve my problems.” Coaching won’t “fix” things for you. It equips you to address challenges from a stronger personal and professional headspace.
“I don’t need coaching… I just need solutions.” That might be true, and if so, then a consultant might be a better choice. But usually, the decision to hire an expensive consultant should come from a place of clarity as that is the right choice for you and your business. Importantly, quick fixes don’t create lasting change. Coaching focuses on you, which leads to sustainable solutions.
Why This Matters for Business Professionals
As an entrepreneur, leader, or business owner, it’s easy to become defined by your problems: tight deadlines, staff challenges, and financial pressures. But leading from a problem-centered mindset creates stress and keeps you stuck.
Shifting to a you-centered mindset changes everything: proactive decisions, energy instead of exhaustion, and a business that reflects your values and strengths.
Final Thoughts: You Are the Focus
Coaching is not about obsessing over problems. Coaching is about you and your ability to turn problems into solutions and opportunities.
Problems will show up along the way; they always do. But with coaching, you’re equipped to face them as the strong, capable, confident leader and owner you are, or are becoming. The problems don’t define the story, YOU do.
